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The Importance of Communication "Connections" with Others

4/24/2018

63 Comments

 
We’ve all had the experience of really “connecting” with someone during a conversation. Often the thought just pops into our minds. What that usually means is that each person understands perfectly what the other person is saying, each can almost finish the other’s sentences, and there exists a total lack of confusion, conflict or frustration. The “connection” that you establish can obviously be different depending on the relationship you have with the other person. But, what is clear is that connection feels good and results in the best possible communication between you and others.

The real question however, is why don’t we seek this “connection” more? If it feels good and results in more satisfying communication regardless of the relationship, then why not try to "connect" with others in every conversation even with people with whom we’re close?

It starts when we start to become more aware of our communication, and more importantly those times when we really feel a connection with another person. Consider thinking about the following questions in your next conversation:
  • What am I doing in terms of my communication with the other person?
  • What’s happening between myself and the other person?
  • What feelings and thoughts am I having?
  • How is the other person communicating in response to what I'm saying and doing?

If we could identify “connection” behaviors, then maybe  we could use those behaviors in every conversation to really move our conversations to another level. The behaviors may be different with different people and in different contexts, but you should be able to identity at least what you did that created a connection. As you learn about those behaviors and build on them, you can begin using them in every conversation with every person and realize more effective and satisfying communication with others.

63 Comments
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    Author

    I help individuals and businesses fix their communication problems. My goal with everyone with whom I work is to make them the best communicator they can be. I always start with the person asking for my help. Where are they now in terms of their communication skills? I don't ask them to start over--just to use the existing skills that are working for them. Then we work together to take actions and set goals that will help them work on those areas in which they want to change or improve.

    I work the same way with the companies with whom I work as well.

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